Hockey Pools well I still am looking for the piece to the puzzle that will put me a bit higher...all in vain, sigh. So in that light I will put down in words absolutely nothing to do with hockey cause I'm at a loss as to what to say.
That being said I will rant about a few things that have pissed me off over the years..
How many of you watched "I dream of genie" as a teenager? That genie was friggin hot! The only wish I had was for her to make me small so I could jump in the bottle with her and just wear her the fuck out.
Speaking of that, I have bone to pick with God. Think about this...Adam and Eve...Close your eyes and picture this...there they are in the beautiful garden doing nothing but doggie, the gut cruncher, the monkey and any other postion they wanted to. Honestly what a life, eating, sleeping, and fucking all day until that skank had to climb up the tree and munch on the apple. Then the world went to shit. So in God's mind he says...Hey bitch, I told you not to eat that shit, yet here you are up my fucking tree chewing on the Granny Smith! What the fuck? Are you stupid? Ok, now Im pissed, so what kind of punishment can I give you....snicker snicker...ok I got it! Every 28 days, give or take Im gonna make you bleed! What he failed to say was along with this glorious affliction he was going to give the ladies PMS. Come on God, What the fuck is that? Why you punishing the Dudes? So once a month your lovely hot wife turns into a freakish creation bordering on a cross between frankenstein, Bobby Knight, a serial killer, a doberman, a possesed cabbage patch kid and the fucking devil on acid. WHY??? Cause da bitch climbed the tree! Not me!! Fuck me, thanks God! I really needed that. Now you all know why guys drink!
I heard someone talking about air conditioning and how it was not natural...stupid fucking engineer can make cloned sheep but air conditioning is not natural? What the hell, I mean its just a solution to a problem...its hot, you turn on a switch, its now cool! Kinda like the time I was hungry, so I ate..you know that full satisified feeling? Idiot. Another one for "Thin the heard day".
Best t-shirt I seen recently...A big dude about 350lbs, wearing a shirt that said "I whipped Anexoria's Ass".
Note to kids...if you get a drive to school from your mommy, you ain't a punk, pull your friggin pants up...Ya comes to my house for a date with my daughter I'll be pullin out my nail gun and will nail em to your stomach.
More stupid thoughts...I remember the day I finally figured out what "WWJD" means...it means What would Jesus Do...this was a bumper sticker I saw...My first thought? Was to write underneath it..."For a Klondike Bar" :-). The best one on a dirty vehicle? "i wish my wife was this dirty" :-)
If drunks can sue bars that provide them the alcohol, then why cant fat people sue candy stores?
So way back in 1985 Trooper was in the Airborne regt and was on exercie down in Quantico Va. After the odd beer (1,5, 27) Trooper jumped on the table in this Jarhead bar and stated in a not so frightening voice "Show me the biggest Jarhead and I'll show you the biggest Chicken". Well honest to God this friggin monster stands up....Ya'll see Independance day? Remember when that big black guy runs to stop him from stealing the chopper? Well dude was bigger than that. I swear, he walks up my table...again while Im standing on it and dude looks me in the eye, I swear he was beast! He says "I guess I'm the biggest Jarhead" My only answer to that was..."And Im the biggest chicken" Thank you Jesus that dude had a good sence of humor! Anyway it was a good night of drinking :-)
My final peeve for the day...You all know my last name, the thing that really pisses me off if when someone asks me...where is that from? My first answer? From my father. Then they laugh (idiots) and say no what country is that from...My answer...Canada.
Monday, November 26, 2007
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Who are you and how did you get here?
Well, that was interesting week to say the least! We started the week by calling in an airstrike on the troops. If we would have looked up in time we would have seen a few ground attack aricraft inbound on Trooper. After they loosed their load of BGU cluser fuck bombs there was not much left of the team! Trades, trades and more trades. Some easy some not so easy. I was coveting 3 defencemen and in the end got one of the 3 I wanted in Frankenstien. As an added bonus we picked up Jokie (finally!), Getslaf, and Rafalski. Raffi I could take or leave, but I did like his performance in Rocky Horror, but he cant play music for shit.
This morning the leprachaun gave me back the leaky wall for another sick bay player, a new acquisition and Mike's 7th rounder next year. What goes around comes around...welcome back Habbibby Boo! You better start producing or I'll call in the F-18's and strafe your ass ya foreign piece of shit. Live up to your salary or donate it to me.
So at the end of the week Im either a pretty smart dude or dumb as a bag of carrots. Time will tell I guess. Now I get to sit back and watch the games cause it might be a while before we can reload the GPMG and pull the trigger on another trade....but who knows.
Speaking of guns....naaa maybe not....
A question was posed to me by by domestic boss this week. It went somethign like this....Darling let's go buy a new house ok? I guess that was a question???? kinda felt like I was corporal again taking orders. So the process has started and we are looking at buying a house. Probably in the Hidden Valley area. I would rather wait till summer, and might win this one but who knows. The only real answer is yes dear as we all know.
Boom goes the Dynamite!
This morning the leprachaun gave me back the leaky wall for another sick bay player, a new acquisition and Mike's 7th rounder next year. What goes around comes around...welcome back Habbibby Boo! You better start producing or I'll call in the F-18's and strafe your ass ya foreign piece of shit. Live up to your salary or donate it to me.
So at the end of the week Im either a pretty smart dude or dumb as a bag of carrots. Time will tell I guess. Now I get to sit back and watch the games cause it might be a while before we can reload the GPMG and pull the trigger on another trade....but who knows.
Speaking of guns....naaa maybe not....
A question was posed to me by by domestic boss this week. It went somethign like this....Darling let's go buy a new house ok? I guess that was a question???? kinda felt like I was corporal again taking orders. So the process has started and we are looking at buying a house. Probably in the Hidden Valley area. I would rather wait till summer, and might win this one but who knows. The only real answer is yes dear as we all know.
Boom goes the Dynamite!
Monday, October 29, 2007
Where's Hasek's package?
I've fallen and I can't get up! Poor Mr broken strikes again....Is this injury the one that will finally make this dinosaur sit up and take notice that he aint in his 20's anymore? I must admit it does not surprise me in the least and is one of the reasons I grabbed Osgood in the draft. Well I got that one right.
Objections...well you know my point on that. At this point I really could care less and will just leave it to time to prove it out. I just shook my head at the idiocy. So if you are looking for another flame-throwing blog entry on this go somewhere else. Suffice it to say that I will be abstaining from any of them in the future. Go nuts.
So Mrs Jagr's little boy has now almost earned the title of "Mr." How long you been in the league hairdo boy! About time you started to grow a pair! Your MIDOL is in the medicine cabinet ya freak. In short he goes out blew a shoe, blew a glove, then gets the biscuit in the mush and spews his chicklets all over the ice, improving his look at the same time, then goes and gets his gums sewn up, comes back and scores a goal. Well done Goldilocks! (If he would have gone and tried to find his teeth like J.R. Superstar, I would give him the title Mr)I still hate you soccer boy. Maybe my boy Randy Jones will decorate the boards with your face as well when he comes back from his....ummm...layoff?
So Shanny finally got going last night. Was about to give up on the old man. He has been in and out of the line-up all year and was going to be replaced by Jokie, but that's another story ain't it.
I wake up and hear that Kipper has parked his ride next to the gravy train and signed a new contract for a dump truck full of cash. 35 Mill? Then Tony Romo gets what 65 mill? And Pay-Rod opts out of his contract...Fuck me. Gonna have to take out a 2nd mortgage to see a game soon.
Look who is back in town...the Broadstreet Bullies have emerged yet again with 3 of their players suspended for brutal hits on opposition teams. Gotta like the fact that at least my boy took out a frog. Patrice, have fun breathing for the next little while! Nice beak dude! I tell you, the only thing worse than a busted beak is broken ribs. Yes I've had both, nose 3 times, 4 ribs, broken wrist, legs, shoulder, ruptured achilles, broken fingers, ankle, and 3 knee surgeries. Talk about a wreck! Sure give me some good stories :-) Sigh, too bad my boy Jones got suspeneded for 2 games when he should have got a medal. Randy next time turn him around and smear him ok, that way I get the points and you get to break the pufta at the same time.
So Ihor beat me by 0.4 points this week. Oh well, I will get it back this week as Paul has broken the golden rule and come out and started talking trash in public stating he was basically gonna kick my ass. Ok old man, keep the yap going. If we dont learn from the past we are destined to repeat it. The last person to come out and smack talk me ended up a bloody corpse in the corner of the rink bleeding profusely and needing medics and finally a coroner. See ya at the funeral home on Sunday Paul!
War Slaughtering Frogs.
Another one bites the dust!
Objections...well you know my point on that. At this point I really could care less and will just leave it to time to prove it out. I just shook my head at the idiocy. So if you are looking for another flame-throwing blog entry on this go somewhere else. Suffice it to say that I will be abstaining from any of them in the future. Go nuts.
So Mrs Jagr's little boy has now almost earned the title of "Mr." How long you been in the league hairdo boy! About time you started to grow a pair! Your MIDOL is in the medicine cabinet ya freak. In short he goes out blew a shoe, blew a glove, then gets the biscuit in the mush and spews his chicklets all over the ice, improving his look at the same time, then goes and gets his gums sewn up, comes back and scores a goal. Well done Goldilocks! (If he would have gone and tried to find his teeth like J.R. Superstar, I would give him the title Mr)I still hate you soccer boy. Maybe my boy Randy Jones will decorate the boards with your face as well when he comes back from his....ummm...layoff?
So Shanny finally got going last night. Was about to give up on the old man. He has been in and out of the line-up all year and was going to be replaced by Jokie, but that's another story ain't it.
I wake up and hear that Kipper has parked his ride next to the gravy train and signed a new contract for a dump truck full of cash. 35 Mill? Then Tony Romo gets what 65 mill? And Pay-Rod opts out of his contract...Fuck me. Gonna have to take out a 2nd mortgage to see a game soon.
Look who is back in town...the Broadstreet Bullies have emerged yet again with 3 of their players suspended for brutal hits on opposition teams. Gotta like the fact that at least my boy took out a frog. Patrice, have fun breathing for the next little while! Nice beak dude! I tell you, the only thing worse than a busted beak is broken ribs. Yes I've had both, nose 3 times, 4 ribs, broken wrist, legs, shoulder, ruptured achilles, broken fingers, ankle, and 3 knee surgeries. Talk about a wreck! Sure give me some good stories :-) Sigh, too bad my boy Jones got suspeneded for 2 games when he should have got a medal. Randy next time turn him around and smear him ok, that way I get the points and you get to break the pufta at the same time.
So Ihor beat me by 0.4 points this week. Oh well, I will get it back this week as Paul has broken the golden rule and come out and started talking trash in public stating he was basically gonna kick my ass. Ok old man, keep the yap going. If we dont learn from the past we are destined to repeat it. The last person to come out and smack talk me ended up a bloody corpse in the corner of the rink bleeding profusely and needing medics and finally a coroner. See ya at the funeral home on Sunday Paul!
War Slaughtering Frogs.
Another one bites the dust!
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Sticks and Stones...If Brian Burke Could Swear.
Grumpy bear has nothing on me this morning. Trevor and I worked on this for a week. This objection thing really friggin twisted me last night. Let me take you back to another trade. One in which I objected to a trade Victor made. I objected to this but the first thing I did was go and talk to Victor, I disagreed with him and then put in my objection. I feel if you are going to make an objection at least have the stones to say who you are...further, "it ain't fair" is a bullshit line and one that smells of fucking jealousy plain and simple....5 minutes to put in an objection sure cuts down the list of suspects. If you are going to object, put in a decent reason....Further, 5 minutes gives you no fucking time at all to give you any god-damn insight into the reasons and there was obviously no research either. So to provide you with what you should have done in the first place I will lay it out here. I will lay it out comparable to someone you might know as well...Sydney Crosby. Yes I understand that Kane is not Crosby. But I challenge you to find someone else with the stats comparable to Kane in the past decade. And if you want to say that Crosby can't be compared to Kane...give me a valid reason why not. Currently only Sundin, Zetterburg, Iginla and Nash are the only ones higher in scoring than Kane.....And Kane has a game or two in hand on a couple of them.
Patrick Kane Major Junior last year.
GP Goals Assists Points +/- PM
58 62 83 145 +42 52 (2.5 PPG)and just so they are close I will put Sid's next...
62 66 102 168 N/A 84 (2.7 PPG)
Sydney Crosby last year of Major Jr
So the next thing you might say is that he is not proven...certainly I agree...however last year when we drafted, if you can tell me that with only one year under his belt and being in my position you would not have taken Sydney #1 overall you would be full of shit and a lying mutherfucker. Plain and simple. Kane is and will be the best player on his team and I suspect that he might even rip Sydney's Rookie scoring this year cause he has a much better supporting cast than Sid did in his first year...Jokinen, yes proven average of 1.2ish a game.....Kane is on a much higher pace... I would be getting Horton's PP linemate and Trev would be getting Toews linemate on the PP as well. Basically benefiting both of us in the end.
Oh Victor, on a side note...remember when you said I drafted Kane too high? This is the part I disagree with in your assessment of my picks...
On another side note....look at the rookies I drafted so far....Kane, Toews, Malkin, Johnson....I think I did pretty good in the rookie scouting don't you think? Maybe I realy do know a little bit.
Oh just a friggin by the by.....Kane had 4 fucking points last night. Back on point...
So the next thing would go to Brunette vs Bieksa.....Im not even gonna get into this. They are so close it is not even funny. Stud defenceman, young franchise player, vs proven stud goal scorer...So that leaves what? a draft pick? If you owned either Kane or Crosby would you not want some sort of compensation? Open your eyes and get some glasses Mr Ref! That book is not a table decoration....If you want the info you have to open it and READ IT.
So at the end of the day to be honest I could understand if the objection came saying the trade was unfair to ME....Not Trevor.....SO DO YOUR FUCKING REASEARCH, and stop your friggin whinning over shit you did not get from me or did not have the players I wanted to get what you want...I said it yesterday didn't I? I knew someone would throw in their kleenex! Reeks of French tri-color through and through.
So ya Im pissed. Ya wanna take it outside? Wait till recess is over.
This system while I understand it is a fucking joke. Put your name to it and give a reason and have the package to talk to the people involved. Do the homework. Object all you want....I object to your Objection!
Wow, this has been the most focused I have been on the blog to date...guess I need to be chewed to stay on point....
I know, I have to work on my subtle. Maybe next life.
War growing a pair
War My mentor Brian the Bear Burkie!
Seasons Beatings
P.S. I feel better now and am back to normal :-)
Patrick Kane Major Junior last year.
GP Goals Assists Points +/- PM
58 62 83 145 +42 52 (2.5 PPG)and just so they are close I will put Sid's next...
62 66 102 168 N/A 84 (2.7 PPG)
Sydney Crosby last year of Major Jr
So the next thing you might say is that he is not proven...certainly I agree...however last year when we drafted, if you can tell me that with only one year under his belt and being in my position you would not have taken Sydney #1 overall you would be full of shit and a lying mutherfucker. Plain and simple. Kane is and will be the best player on his team and I suspect that he might even rip Sydney's Rookie scoring this year cause he has a much better supporting cast than Sid did in his first year...Jokinen, yes proven average of 1.2ish a game.....Kane is on a much higher pace... I would be getting Horton's PP linemate and Trev would be getting Toews linemate on the PP as well. Basically benefiting both of us in the end.
Oh Victor, on a side note...remember when you said I drafted Kane too high? This is the part I disagree with in your assessment of my picks...
On another side note....look at the rookies I drafted so far....Kane, Toews, Malkin, Johnson....I think I did pretty good in the rookie scouting don't you think? Maybe I realy do know a little bit.
Oh just a friggin by the by.....Kane had 4 fucking points last night. Back on point...
So the next thing would go to Brunette vs Bieksa.....Im not even gonna get into this. They are so close it is not even funny. Stud defenceman, young franchise player, vs proven stud goal scorer...So that leaves what? a draft pick? If you owned either Kane or Crosby would you not want some sort of compensation? Open your eyes and get some glasses Mr Ref! That book is not a table decoration....If you want the info you have to open it and READ IT.
So at the end of the day to be honest I could understand if the objection came saying the trade was unfair to ME....Not Trevor.....SO DO YOUR FUCKING REASEARCH, and stop your friggin whinning over shit you did not get from me or did not have the players I wanted to get what you want...I said it yesterday didn't I? I knew someone would throw in their kleenex! Reeks of French tri-color through and through.
So ya Im pissed. Ya wanna take it outside? Wait till recess is over.
This system while I understand it is a fucking joke. Put your name to it and give a reason and have the package to talk to the people involved. Do the homework. Object all you want....I object to your Objection!
Wow, this has been the most focused I have been on the blog to date...guess I need to be chewed to stay on point....
I know, I have to work on my subtle. Maybe next life.
War growing a pair
War My mentor Brian the Bear Burkie!
Seasons Beatings
P.S. I feel better now and am back to normal :-)
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Mine Eyes Have Seen the Glory!
SO after a year of just pretty much letting things ride on the team I had dressed, I decided to actually work my bench this year and holy crap what a difference a little efffort makes. The two basement dwellers, myself and Adam have rocketed up the standings to 1st and 5th overall and have won 3 out of 4 head to head matches...only reason we have not gone perfect is that we went against each other the first week. I lost...see the last post. However this week....The Troopers pulled out the .30cal and put an absolute BLOODY BEAT-DOWN on the commish by practically doubling his enemic point total. See that is what happens when you have little friggin weasels and frog pufta cry-babies on your team Mike. Mike the Medics can be found at the front of the building or by dialing 9-911 and give them your information...someon will come and pull the shrapnel out your corpse!
Holly trade talks Trooper! I have got no less than 5 people comming to me asking for trades to date and all have been pretty good offers, with the exception of one. I had to think about them all but in reality at this point there is only one player I want to pry away from someone, he should listen me thinks! But hey it is still early. Troopers team interest includes, in no particular order...Shanny, Kane, Bieksa, Crosby (as I laugh), Horton (still giggling), and my injured goalie...Let-one-in. I'm kinda liking being where I am in the standings and a little hesitant trading anyone until I get "an offer you can't refuse"...but then the rest of you bastards will be jealous and reject the trade cause you did not get him, right :-)
P.S. some of you hold your nickles and dimes so tight the beaver cries and bluenose sinks!
Williams - Chi - Trev you are a shit-pump, fuck I was pissed when I heard you scooped him on me. I got in at 0530 to grab him and beat Paul to the punch but then I heard Trev sent his at 0030. Grrrr! So in the meantime I have been inundating Ihor with my stupid mind changing dumb ass e-mails...I want him....no stop...I want him. Ihor is either laughing his ass off at me or just shaking his heading wondering how I can get up in the morning without assistance! Brush my teeth? Come on!
So the DUMB ASS AWARD of the week goes to..........
Me and Paul! both of us for not realizing that a greazy slimy scumball SIGS officer --- Is there really anything else? would be up at that hour to scoop the player of our choice. Well done Trev and thanks for nothing butt-munch!
On different note.....It is with tears in my eyes that the local racing season is over. Another year of sinking money into the bottomless pit we call our race car is over, sigh. Up until the last race we were in 3rd position with the Trooper comming home this year with a couple of 3rd place trophies. My partner Dave from the FAN960 radio got his first trophy ever this year with a 3rd and Tim our 'mentor' got a first. We were doing great until the last race when yours truly forgot to check the camber ont he right front tire prior to the race and as with anything mechanical...things move....we are allowed 5 degrees. We came in second that night however after our tech inspection were found to have a camber of 5.5 dgrees and were disqualified and placed at the back of the pack. Hence we dropped from 3rd to 7th at the end of the eyear. It was a tight race this year. ANother reason why I should recieve the award :-(
Yeah yeah I know its a hockey blog but racing has been in my blood for years!
Trooper has been down with food poisoning lately and had to take last thursday and friday off...if any of ya'll have stocks in imodium or Charmin do yourself a favor and check the market...Im sure you just made some money! On another shitty note, I ain't never gonna make no PMS jokes no more! Talk about cramps from hell! I laugh as all of you are now screaming "TO MUCH INFO!" Did not know weather to fart or shit so discretion being the better part of valor I ran to the crapper every time I thought I would do either. At the end I was screaming for a god-damn sno-cone to wipe my ass! On a good note, on Firday as I was curled up in the fetal position on the couch I watched We Are Marshall...Great movie, watch it! Very appropo as well considering they are named the Marshall Thundering Herd and I had the Thundering Shits! I'm a huge College football fan....Ask Trevor....anyway the Herd is 0-7 this year... If you really give a shit.
This week Im up against Ihor and expect another outstanding win! My predictions...
Adam, Jordan, Victor, Kevin, Mike and the TROOPER will emerge Victorious!
War Imodium, pepto bismol and the inventors of toilet paper!
"Not so much small Bear!" --- Bite me mom my ass she is on fire!!!!
Holly trade talks Trooper! I have got no less than 5 people comming to me asking for trades to date and all have been pretty good offers, with the exception of one. I had to think about them all but in reality at this point there is only one player I want to pry away from someone, he should listen me thinks! But hey it is still early. Troopers team interest includes, in no particular order...Shanny, Kane, Bieksa, Crosby (as I laugh), Horton (still giggling), and my injured goalie...Let-one-in. I'm kinda liking being where I am in the standings and a little hesitant trading anyone until I get "an offer you can't refuse"...but then the rest of you bastards will be jealous and reject the trade cause you did not get him, right :-)
P.S. some of you hold your nickles and dimes so tight the beaver cries and bluenose sinks!
Williams - Chi - Trev you are a shit-pump, fuck I was pissed when I heard you scooped him on me. I got in at 0530 to grab him and beat Paul to the punch but then I heard Trev sent his at 0030. Grrrr! So in the meantime I have been inundating Ihor with my stupid mind changing dumb ass e-mails...I want him....no stop...I want him. Ihor is either laughing his ass off at me or just shaking his heading wondering how I can get up in the morning without assistance! Brush my teeth? Come on!
So the DUMB ASS AWARD of the week goes to..........
Me and Paul! both of us for not realizing that a greazy slimy scumball SIGS officer --- Is there really anything else? would be up at that hour to scoop the player of our choice. Well done Trev and thanks for nothing butt-munch!
On different note.....It is with tears in my eyes that the local racing season is over. Another year of sinking money into the bottomless pit we call our race car is over, sigh. Up until the last race we were in 3rd position with the Trooper comming home this year with a couple of 3rd place trophies. My partner Dave from the FAN960 radio got his first trophy ever this year with a 3rd and Tim our 'mentor' got a first. We were doing great until the last race when yours truly forgot to check the camber ont he right front tire prior to the race and as with anything mechanical...things move....we are allowed 5 degrees. We came in second that night however after our tech inspection were found to have a camber of 5.5 dgrees and were disqualified and placed at the back of the pack. Hence we dropped from 3rd to 7th at the end of the eyear. It was a tight race this year. ANother reason why I should recieve the award :-(
Yeah yeah I know its a hockey blog but racing has been in my blood for years!
Trooper has been down with food poisoning lately and had to take last thursday and friday off...if any of ya'll have stocks in imodium or Charmin do yourself a favor and check the market...Im sure you just made some money! On another shitty note, I ain't never gonna make no PMS jokes no more! Talk about cramps from hell! I laugh as all of you are now screaming "TO MUCH INFO!" Did not know weather to fart or shit so discretion being the better part of valor I ran to the crapper every time I thought I would do either. At the end I was screaming for a god-damn sno-cone to wipe my ass! On a good note, on Firday as I was curled up in the fetal position on the couch I watched We Are Marshall...Great movie, watch it! Very appropo as well considering they are named the Marshall Thundering Herd and I had the Thundering Shits! I'm a huge College football fan....Ask Trevor....anyway the Herd is 0-7 this year... If you really give a shit.
This week Im up against Ihor and expect another outstanding win! My predictions...
Adam, Jordan, Victor, Kevin, Mike and the TROOPER will emerge Victorious!
War Imodium, pepto bismol and the inventors of toilet paper!
"Not so much small Bear!" --- Bite me mom my ass she is on fire!!!!
Monday, October 15, 2007
Come on! Seriously! What the hell is this?
Pissed Pissed and really Pissed! That is how I feel at the moment. For the first time in over a year I actually had a really good week with an amazing weekend in points. I was glued to the tubeage on Saturday and with the beautiful 52 in HDTV going in overdrive with NASCAR and HNIC in split picture mode I was in heaven! I was constantly hoping for a 20-19 score in the Leaf-Penguin game as I dont have any of the goalies...suckers! Well my buds came through and this week Mr Tucker has earned a spot in the line-up while bumping out the perenial starter in Shanny. Or his new name for this year...Mr. Nothing...christ he has been useless! Kinda serves him right for being on team with Mrs Jagrmeister!
SO, I look at the head to head things and what to my new eyeballs (new cause I can see again after $600 worth of new spectacles...another story there trust me!) do I see? I got beat this week in the head to head by the friggin FISH!!! Not to mention that overall I kicked the majority of your asses! I wont name names but they start with:
Ryan 53.9
Sith (JW) 46.5
Shamrocks (Trevor) 44.5
Flyin Elbows (Mark) 39.8
GGopher (Jordan) 52.5
Boomers (Paul) 44.5
Sather's Eyes (Victor) 48.5
TROOPER had 58.7 this week! But to my dismay I still see a Big "L" in the weekly head to head...this SUCKS!!!! Hey Bear Lover...Start running Bruin boy cause I'm a gonna put a size 10 up your ass this week!
Ok gents it is time to help out the Commish...Any of ya'll gonna step up? No I won't, sorry and not being sarcastic but I just don't have the time at the moment.
Where is the NHL going? just when you think the players have a handle on respectability we see the idiot ToooTooo go frigin charge happy on an opponent with nothing but injury in his mind...and what does he get? Bugger All. This is friggin crazy, seriously just nuts and then dod you see him do the Triple gainer, double swan rotation as he got smacked to the ice? Holy dive Batman! Sure he took him down with a 'line but it weren't that bad, he never hit his head like he acted...fucking pussy. Stand up and get your beats like ya deserve! I hate assholes like that! TooToo is Tootoo Stupid! I love the way the Brits say "stupid" its like Sttuuuuuupit hilarious really.
Oh well...So I went to the eye doctor last thursday cause i turns out I could not read my paper or e-mails when I got to work... Seems I have Cataracts in my left eye and have to go back this comming Saturday to get them looked at a bit more cause the doc is worried that I have them at this age. Friggin brain cancer prolly! It would be my luck! Oh well, fingers crossed. So to make a long story short I had to buy not one but two g'damn pairs of specs...one to wear everyday...which being me of course I left at home this am...fuck...Im so thick some days I amaze myself if I can get up! and the other pair for working on the puter...yes Im wearing them now...so if I bump into you in the hall and knock ya on your ass it is truely a mistake...even if with an elbow, a crosscheck to the face or a jump as you come around a corner :-)
Lineup changes this week...out are Shanny, Let-one-in, Clown, Treblinka and Leopoldville...in are Tucker, the Legacy, Erskine, Kane and Lang. Another good week on the horizon!
Ok car time...In a nutshell I'm happy with the new G6, good gas mileage, it's north american, and my wife likes it, all in all Im happy and since Im still getting a little more somethin' somethin' at home it was a good decision!!!!
Can't wait to get home tonight!
War Getting Some!!!
SO, I look at the head to head things and what to my new eyeballs (new cause I can see again after $600 worth of new spectacles...another story there trust me!) do I see? I got beat this week in the head to head by the friggin FISH!!! Not to mention that overall I kicked the majority of your asses! I wont name names but they start with:
Ryan 53.9
Sith (JW) 46.5
Shamrocks (Trevor) 44.5
Flyin Elbows (Mark) 39.8
GGopher (Jordan) 52.5
Boomers (Paul) 44.5
Sather's Eyes (Victor) 48.5
TROOPER had 58.7 this week! But to my dismay I still see a Big "L" in the weekly head to head...this SUCKS!!!! Hey Bear Lover...Start running Bruin boy cause I'm a gonna put a size 10 up your ass this week!
Ok gents it is time to help out the Commish...Any of ya'll gonna step up? No I won't, sorry and not being sarcastic but I just don't have the time at the moment.
Where is the NHL going? just when you think the players have a handle on respectability we see the idiot ToooTooo go frigin charge happy on an opponent with nothing but injury in his mind...and what does he get? Bugger All. This is friggin crazy, seriously just nuts and then dod you see him do the Triple gainer, double swan rotation as he got smacked to the ice? Holy dive Batman! Sure he took him down with a 'line but it weren't that bad, he never hit his head like he acted...fucking pussy. Stand up and get your beats like ya deserve! I hate assholes like that! TooToo is Tootoo Stupid! I love the way the Brits say "stupid" its like Sttuuuuuupit hilarious really.
Oh well...So I went to the eye doctor last thursday cause i turns out I could not read my paper or e-mails when I got to work... Seems I have Cataracts in my left eye and have to go back this comming Saturday to get them looked at a bit more cause the doc is worried that I have them at this age. Friggin brain cancer prolly! It would be my luck! Oh well, fingers crossed. So to make a long story short I had to buy not one but two g'damn pairs of specs...one to wear everyday...which being me of course I left at home this am...fuck...Im so thick some days I amaze myself if I can get up! and the other pair for working on the puter...yes Im wearing them now...so if I bump into you in the hall and knock ya on your ass it is truely a mistake...even if with an elbow, a crosscheck to the face or a jump as you come around a corner :-)
Lineup changes this week...out are Shanny, Let-one-in, Clown, Treblinka and Leopoldville...in are Tucker, the Legacy, Erskine, Kane and Lang. Another good week on the horizon!
Ok car time...In a nutshell I'm happy with the new G6, good gas mileage, it's north american, and my wife likes it, all in all Im happy and since Im still getting a little more somethin' somethin' at home it was a good decision!!!!
Can't wait to get home tonight!
War Getting Some!!!
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
Red is a Beautiful Color!
Well the weekend is over and alas I have dissapointed ya'll by not in fact being in last place! grant you Sunday morning I was! This week has a huge change in my roster spots as the people I thought would be alright ended up crashing and burning like a bloody Napalm strike! Tucker is on the third line and looks absolutely below average, hence my trade to the Irish for Antropov, and then I almost crapped as I heard that Blake had cancer! Looks like he will be alright as he is taking 'oral treatment'....hmmm oral treatment eh? hot wife? He will continue to play. So Tucker, Lang, and Legacy (injured) are out and The Wall, Roberts and Antropov are in...fingers crossed for a good week.
As the title shows my good north american red-neck sence kicked in on Friday. The paint is being re-applied! After talking to the Nissan folks I was a tad pissed as they ended up being a typical "fuck the client" dealer. These shitpumps had no idea that I actually did in fact understand that I knew how much my truck was worth and that they were really trying to screw me. So basically I said I was out and will go to CMP Classic (where I used to work) and buy a good ole Chevy! I did, I take delivery tomorrow of a new 2007 Pontiac G6. Nothing fancy but I got 4K more for my Avalanche there than at Sunridge Nissan and 0% financing as compared to the 8% I was quoted...only after they had promised me 3% and then changed their mind due to some dumb ass excuse about not being able to find the car I wanted and would have to buy the one I wanted from a dealer in Ontario or the like and they would have to pay full price. Basically I told them to bugger off and I left. I guess if people can pay the car off immediately they are alright and can handle this, but needless to say I was pissed. Oh I also got the 4-way protection package in the price as well. We never got to that stage at Sunridge Nissan. Anyway, if you want a Nissan, knock yourself out. I'm really looking forward to saving a couple of hundy in gas every month! I'll stick to the North American product thanks, warranties are the same as well.....Now only if it came in a good Maroon Airborne color.....hummmm spray bombs work on the race car!
Oh yes, hockey....weekly cudos to Adam and Victor! Holy Zetterburg Adam! Nice week dude. The b-b-q Crow needs a little tenderizer but is tasty none-the-less. I was proved right on Victor and brutally wrong on Adam..keep it up Adam, it's nice to see a fellow cellar dweller do well...now stop it asshole and get the fuck back below me where you belong!
Did ya see the skank American sprinter turned in her 5 medals cause she was on beef roids? Sweet, talk about eating crow! How did that taste M. Jones? I have a spare plate if you wish to pull up a chair!
War 4 door sedans with little kids in the back!
Sigh...Im such a stud
As the title shows my good north american red-neck sence kicked in on Friday. The paint is being re-applied! After talking to the Nissan folks I was a tad pissed as they ended up being a typical "fuck the client" dealer. These shitpumps had no idea that I actually did in fact understand that I knew how much my truck was worth and that they were really trying to screw me. So basically I said I was out and will go to CMP Classic (where I used to work) and buy a good ole Chevy! I did, I take delivery tomorrow of a new 2007 Pontiac G6. Nothing fancy but I got 4K more for my Avalanche there than at Sunridge Nissan and 0% financing as compared to the 8% I was quoted...only after they had promised me 3% and then changed their mind due to some dumb ass excuse about not being able to find the car I wanted and would have to buy the one I wanted from a dealer in Ontario or the like and they would have to pay full price. Basically I told them to bugger off and I left. I guess if people can pay the car off immediately they are alright and can handle this, but needless to say I was pissed. Oh I also got the 4-way protection package in the price as well. We never got to that stage at Sunridge Nissan. Anyway, if you want a Nissan, knock yourself out. I'm really looking forward to saving a couple of hundy in gas every month! I'll stick to the North American product thanks, warranties are the same as well.....Now only if it came in a good Maroon Airborne color.....hummmm spray bombs work on the race car!
Oh yes, hockey....weekly cudos to Adam and Victor! Holy Zetterburg Adam! Nice week dude. The b-b-q Crow needs a little tenderizer but is tasty none-the-less. I was proved right on Victor and brutally wrong on Adam..keep it up Adam, it's nice to see a fellow cellar dweller do well...now stop it asshole and get the fuck back below me where you belong!
Did ya see the skank American sprinter turned in her 5 medals cause she was on beef roids? Sweet, talk about eating crow! How did that taste M. Jones? I have a spare plate if you wish to pull up a chair!
War 4 door sedans with little kids in the back!
Sigh...Im such a stud
Thursday, October 4, 2007
Game On!!
Can you Smell what the Trooper is cooking!
Yeah Baby! It has finally happened, the season started last night and the Trooper was parked in front of the big 52" HD tv with his feet up just chillin watching the leafs get stomped. Well at least my troops got me some points and I pulled out of the basement and rocketed aehad of some of the other GM's...as expected of course. Tonight we should be making some more ground as we have a ton of players in action..
New Jersey Vs Tampa Bay? Jesus I would rather watch a Very Brady Christmas than these two teams. They both make me sick. And our favorite team to the north has its opener today as well...So just what do game day celebrations consist of in the Chuck? Perhaps wearing clean underwear, if you can find them from the dump, cause that is probably where you are living anyway! Good Luck Losers! Seasons Beatings to you!
Ahhh Kevin *Hello knock knock* just cause you won last year does not mean that you can just showw up and win again dude! You have to have players that will....well play! 2 of them are in the minors and another on your active roster is out with a blown ankle.
The Flames have their opener tonight against Philly. I suspect a Flame win and the Iron Idiot Keenen will prolly have a loaded heater in the dressing room and blood will be spilled if they lose to one of his former teams on his first night. Talk about living in fear!
So it appears that you all are enjoying the escapades of the vehicle buying joke. Having fun at the ol Troopers expense it appears...well I would be laughin too I guess. Anyway today the price war starts. At lunch I will going to the dealer and beginning the war of negotiation. What fun! I have a price in mind and seeing as I'm such a subtle individual I'm sure the salesman is really looking forward to this as well! The young fellow is gonna get schooled today me thinks! And at the end Trooper will be driving a new car made in some far away land that he swore he would never do...How times change. Maybe I'll even get a free Nissan thermos out of the deal! Lucky me! I have to keep telling myself that the gas savings are worth it. I guess. I have taken to wearing turtlenecks because my neck is so raw from the "redneck removal process" and I'm embarassed!
Victor....Holy shit dude Corey Perry is SMOKIN!!! That would be somethign if he could keep up that pace! Nice insurmountable lead dude. You can stop that shit anytime! Im really NOT into watching you absolutely destroy the field this early in the game! My truck might just have a final coup-de-grace today and run you over! Well done Victor Seriously...Told ya you were hard on yourself. Sigh...the misery continues.
Paul Stasny (sp) wow...a hat trick half way through the second period? I think he might be ok? Damn. Hey what is with the NHL saying it has changed? I was looking at the rosters and found there are more goons than I can ever remember. The league is looking like it will be more of bloodbath than ever this year. And how about the games in the UK? The only time the dumb-ass Brits cheered was when there was a fight! Go back to soccer.
Looking into my crystal ball I see St Louis making me some points tonight against the desert dwellers. I hate to slam the great one but Wayne, your team sucks huge donkey dongs. Hire a manager son. Your team is an embarassment.
War Fuel Economy
ahhh just shoot me.
Yeah Baby! It has finally happened, the season started last night and the Trooper was parked in front of the big 52" HD tv with his feet up just chillin watching the leafs get stomped. Well at least my troops got me some points and I pulled out of the basement and rocketed aehad of some of the other GM's...as expected of course. Tonight we should be making some more ground as we have a ton of players in action..
New Jersey Vs Tampa Bay? Jesus I would rather watch a Very Brady Christmas than these two teams. They both make me sick. And our favorite team to the north has its opener today as well...So just what do game day celebrations consist of in the Chuck? Perhaps wearing clean underwear, if you can find them from the dump, cause that is probably where you are living anyway! Good Luck Losers! Seasons Beatings to you!
Ahhh Kevin *Hello knock knock* just cause you won last year does not mean that you can just showw up and win again dude! You have to have players that will....well play! 2 of them are in the minors and another on your active roster is out with a blown ankle.
The Flames have their opener tonight against Philly. I suspect a Flame win and the Iron Idiot Keenen will prolly have a loaded heater in the dressing room and blood will be spilled if they lose to one of his former teams on his first night. Talk about living in fear!
So it appears that you all are enjoying the escapades of the vehicle buying joke. Having fun at the ol Troopers expense it appears...well I would be laughin too I guess. Anyway today the price war starts. At lunch I will going to the dealer and beginning the war of negotiation. What fun! I have a price in mind and seeing as I'm such a subtle individual I'm sure the salesman is really looking forward to this as well! The young fellow is gonna get schooled today me thinks! And at the end Trooper will be driving a new car made in some far away land that he swore he would never do...How times change. Maybe I'll even get a free Nissan thermos out of the deal! Lucky me! I have to keep telling myself that the gas savings are worth it. I guess. I have taken to wearing turtlenecks because my neck is so raw from the "redneck removal process" and I'm embarassed!
Victor....Holy shit dude Corey Perry is SMOKIN!!! That would be somethign if he could keep up that pace! Nice insurmountable lead dude. You can stop that shit anytime! Im really NOT into watching you absolutely destroy the field this early in the game! My truck might just have a final coup-de-grace today and run you over! Well done Victor Seriously...Told ya you were hard on yourself. Sigh...the misery continues.
Paul Stasny (sp) wow...a hat trick half way through the second period? I think he might be ok? Damn. Hey what is with the NHL saying it has changed? I was looking at the rosters and found there are more goons than I can ever remember. The league is looking like it will be more of bloodbath than ever this year. And how about the games in the UK? The only time the dumb-ass Brits cheered was when there was a fight! Go back to soccer.
Looking into my crystal ball I see St Louis making me some points tonight against the desert dwellers. I hate to slam the great one but Wayne, your team sucks huge donkey dongs. Hire a manager son. Your team is an embarassment.
War Fuel Economy
ahhh just shoot me.
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
The inquisitive Eyebrow
Ihor, the land of smack has finally made it around to you. The problem with smacking this team is that by the time I post the friggin thing his team will have changed again. Ihor changes his team more often than a Vegas Brothel changes its sheets! How the HELL do you even know who is in the line up on a weekly basis? Thank fuck this is not a salary cap league or your accountant would have either gone friggin bonkers, found a bridge to jump off, or put a knife through your heart...and wallet! And then burned your Corporate Amex card!
Mike Commodore, nice friggin lettuce dude....problem is you are supposed to be a hockey player not a freak show on skates. That is why we have the ice capades and the heavyweight champion Tonya Harding!
And where would we be without little slamming of our favorite hated city to the north. Do you guys have indoor plumbing yet? Possibly a sewer system? Or does it still go right into that creek you call a river? Poor folks in Sask! Oh and don't waste your time trying to slam me back Ihor....remember this, Im the Tony Soprano of this pools blog and you are the small italian pizza boy. Im Ron Jeremy and you are Mr Bobbit. Im Eminem and you are little Ihor...Im.....I'm...out of what is the word....damn mind....oh yeah comparisons...see I told you it would come to me. Hey Edmonton, invest in some street cleaners, dental care, weight watchers and vehicles that are less than 20 years old! What a Ghetto. Warsaw looked better in 1943! I want to vomit every time I think about that place!
Just my luck you got the duvet cover again. One good hit and he will be back in bed with a broken nail again...Another poor trade by Trooper in which I got picks ripped from me. I stay away from this guy faster than a runway model pushs away from a buffet table.
Did you guys hear that Isiah Thomas just got found liable for sexual harassment? Seriously, if you were a woman...ok stay away from that but just pretend...why would you put up with that from a sawed off 4'8" little piece of shit? Just fucking kick him in the nuts and be done with it.
How are your goalies this year dude? HA HA! Kinda like someone else I know? Awww that's to bad and I truly feel your pain. But if you want to step up to the plate before the others....I have a great deal for you my U.N. Friend.
Now for a little insight to the Troopers background. When I was just a little trooper in high school I lived in Kanata...all the inbred, dumb ass, lumberjacket wearing, no tooth shitpumps from Carp came to my school on the oldest bloody cheesewagon you could find....In it were the ugliest sum-bitches ya ever seen....one of whom was Fosters Dad. I dont know how many fights we got in but I do know I was not the winner in the majority of them. I really feel for the cattle in Carp! The Foster's are a tough lot and Kurtis I bet is as well.
Jagr....I would rather have ballerinas on my team than this dive artist, he must have played a ton of soccer in his youth to perfect his art. Just so you know, soccer is not a sport but rather an excuse to riot. It is worse than cricket. At least in cricket they get hard wooden balls thrown at them! Soccer players have no balls. My personal nightmare when I was a soccer dad was trying to figure out how many orange slices and Capri Suns were needed for the team when it was my turn to be the snack fag. Yes my son woke up and realized he no longer wanted to play. It was the proudest day of my life!
Sean Avery....this guy is so dirty I have to take a shower after every time I see him play.
Ihor, your team seems to be well on the way to another good finish and I wish you the best. Please keep up the trading so I have something to write about during the season!
War counting my fingers after trades with Ihor!
If the glove dont fit you must acquit!
Mike Commodore, nice friggin lettuce dude....problem is you are supposed to be a hockey player not a freak show on skates. That is why we have the ice capades and the heavyweight champion Tonya Harding!
And where would we be without little slamming of our favorite hated city to the north. Do you guys have indoor plumbing yet? Possibly a sewer system? Or does it still go right into that creek you call a river? Poor folks in Sask! Oh and don't waste your time trying to slam me back Ihor....remember this, Im the Tony Soprano of this pools blog and you are the small italian pizza boy. Im Ron Jeremy and you are Mr Bobbit. Im Eminem and you are little Ihor...Im.....I'm...out of what is the word....damn mind....oh yeah comparisons...see I told you it would come to me. Hey Edmonton, invest in some street cleaners, dental care, weight watchers and vehicles that are less than 20 years old! What a Ghetto. Warsaw looked better in 1943! I want to vomit every time I think about that place!
Just my luck you got the duvet cover again. One good hit and he will be back in bed with a broken nail again...Another poor trade by Trooper in which I got picks ripped from me. I stay away from this guy faster than a runway model pushs away from a buffet table.
Did you guys hear that Isiah Thomas just got found liable for sexual harassment? Seriously, if you were a woman...ok stay away from that but just pretend...why would you put up with that from a sawed off 4'8" little piece of shit? Just fucking kick him in the nuts and be done with it.
How are your goalies this year dude? HA HA! Kinda like someone else I know? Awww that's to bad and I truly feel your pain. But if you want to step up to the plate before the others....I have a great deal for you my U.N. Friend.
Now for a little insight to the Troopers background. When I was just a little trooper in high school I lived in Kanata...all the inbred, dumb ass, lumberjacket wearing, no tooth shitpumps from Carp came to my school on the oldest bloody cheesewagon you could find....In it were the ugliest sum-bitches ya ever seen....one of whom was Fosters Dad. I dont know how many fights we got in but I do know I was not the winner in the majority of them. I really feel for the cattle in Carp! The Foster's are a tough lot and Kurtis I bet is as well.
Jagr....I would rather have ballerinas on my team than this dive artist, he must have played a ton of soccer in his youth to perfect his art. Just so you know, soccer is not a sport but rather an excuse to riot. It is worse than cricket. At least in cricket they get hard wooden balls thrown at them! Soccer players have no balls. My personal nightmare when I was a soccer dad was trying to figure out how many orange slices and Capri Suns were needed for the team when it was my turn to be the snack fag. Yes my son woke up and realized he no longer wanted to play. It was the proudest day of my life!
Sean Avery....this guy is so dirty I have to take a shower after every time I see him play.
Ihor, your team seems to be well on the way to another good finish and I wish you the best. Please keep up the trading so I have something to write about during the season!
War counting my fingers after trades with Ihor!
If the glove dont fit you must acquit!
Anonymity will not protect you from the Wrath!!
On we move to Ryan, hiding like the bad child who was just scolded by the teacher and told to sit in the corner for flicking boogers at the cute girl in class. Ain't it amazing what we did as kids to get a girls attention? And as we grow older we still find ourselves doing what we can to get her attention....see yesterday's post. God us male species are a sorry lot sometimes! But in the end when you are all tied up and she is whiping you....ok maybe I'll save that for another time and place!
Hockey right....but first....a quick update on new vehicle situation. Well it appears that the neck washing is in full effect at Troopers house. The javex and turpentine have been applied and the neck is looking slightly worse for wear at the moment after much scrubbing by said hot wife. I have been informed after taking an '07 Altima out for a test drive last night that "She who must be obeyed" likes it and promptly informed me that I do as well, and that we will probably be acquiring stated machine in the next couple of days for my use and driving pleasure. You should have seen the salesmans face when I asked him if I could put a lift kit in it! Damn near died. Foreign piece of shit. Listen we all have our hangups, mine is buying things that supported the axis. I lost 3 uncles in WW2, 2 to Germans and 1 to the Japs. Yes I hold a grudge. I have a real hard time buying anything that is associated with either country and would not be caught dead in any of these....However, I guess if my Russian wife can get over it so can I.....maybe.
Hey Ryan, ya don't gots no backup Defense dude....grant you with what is left that is available you might as well dress Paul if someone gets injured! Sorry Paul, twice in 2 days is tough to be hit but you a big boy, you can take it Boomer! Just stay out of my can!!
This year I will be initiating the "Trooper Roman Candle Award" on a weekly basis. If you don't have an idea of what a Roman Candle is...in a nutshell it is parachute that does not open properly and the loser to whom it is attached augers in and dies. Why sir did you not put Bernier in net this week? You had a free weekend and could be 2.9 points up on most of us but NOOOOOO you chose not to look at your team and manage it properly! Sad Sad Sad Ryan! I truly expect more out of you seeing as you were ahead of me last year.....You Sir are the prestigous and honoured winner of the award this week.....Not fair you say? My friggin blog says I.
All in all I likes your forwards, specially Justine Williams and Choochoo train! but your defense blows dead chickens. Pickard? Jean Luc you ain't! No friggin Enterprise here for your commanding presence. -19 last year....Grab the bench dude and hold on tight before Bobby sends your ass packing across the street to the Phantoms! Another useless Separatist from the land of Freedom fries with WHITE gravy. Throw in the flag Jean Luc!
It will be interesting to see if the perenial communist Samsonov can keep his samsonite luggage collection in one place longer than a year this time before wearing out his welcome yet again. Dude there are only so many teams in the league!
Ryan is one of the people in my gunsights this year to be ahead of at the end. If some of me gents can step up and be all they can be I have a chance.
War sitting in silence in the corner being Insignificant!
I SEE YOU!
Hockey right....but first....a quick update on new vehicle situation. Well it appears that the neck washing is in full effect at Troopers house. The javex and turpentine have been applied and the neck is looking slightly worse for wear at the moment after much scrubbing by said hot wife. I have been informed after taking an '07 Altima out for a test drive last night that "She who must be obeyed" likes it and promptly informed me that I do as well, and that we will probably be acquiring stated machine in the next couple of days for my use and driving pleasure. You should have seen the salesmans face when I asked him if I could put a lift kit in it! Damn near died. Foreign piece of shit. Listen we all have our hangups, mine is buying things that supported the axis. I lost 3 uncles in WW2, 2 to Germans and 1 to the Japs. Yes I hold a grudge. I have a real hard time buying anything that is associated with either country and would not be caught dead in any of these....However, I guess if my Russian wife can get over it so can I.....maybe.
Hey Ryan, ya don't gots no backup Defense dude....grant you with what is left that is available you might as well dress Paul if someone gets injured! Sorry Paul, twice in 2 days is tough to be hit but you a big boy, you can take it Boomer! Just stay out of my can!!
This year I will be initiating the "Trooper Roman Candle Award" on a weekly basis. If you don't have an idea of what a Roman Candle is...in a nutshell it is parachute that does not open properly and the loser to whom it is attached augers in and dies. Why sir did you not put Bernier in net this week? You had a free weekend and could be 2.9 points up on most of us but NOOOOOO you chose not to look at your team and manage it properly! Sad Sad Sad Ryan! I truly expect more out of you seeing as you were ahead of me last year.....You Sir are the prestigous and honoured winner of the award this week.....Not fair you say? My friggin blog says I.
All in all I likes your forwards, specially Justine Williams and Choochoo train! but your defense blows dead chickens. Pickard? Jean Luc you ain't! No friggin Enterprise here for your commanding presence. -19 last year....Grab the bench dude and hold on tight before Bobby sends your ass packing across the street to the Phantoms! Another useless Separatist from the land of Freedom fries with WHITE gravy. Throw in the flag Jean Luc!
It will be interesting to see if the perenial communist Samsonov can keep his samsonite luggage collection in one place longer than a year this time before wearing out his welcome yet again. Dude there are only so many teams in the league!
Ryan is one of the people in my gunsights this year to be ahead of at the end. If some of me gents can step up and be all they can be I have a chance.
War sitting in silence in the corner being Insignificant!
I SEE YOU!
Monday, October 1, 2007
Get It on, bang a gong, get it on!
Holy Habitant Batman!! Is the name Paul a french name? How would one say that in cypher? Beats the hell out of me. All I know is that my name means "The handsome one"....My mommy loved me. So...down to business....Looks like Chris-the-ball Huet will have some competition this year with the new kid Price. I'm just waiting for the day when Mr Huet pulls the white flag out of his wallet in the middle of the game and goes Patrick Roy on the Frogs management. On a side note, did you know that all french citizens are issued a white flag with their birth certificate? Honest to God truth. Friggin English never learned anything after all their wars with the french. The box heads took over native frog land and what did the good citizens of the British Commonwealth do???? We went over to Normandy and saved their ass! We should have landed somewhere else and gave France to the Reds at the end of the war...Maybe they could have made it a nation. We should be slapped....but on a funny note...it would be kind of neat to hear the French talking Russian. The tri-color does have red in it!
How do I do that? Go from one subject to another in an instant? Think it's the A.D.D.
Penner, now this guy is cool. 245 pounds of rompin stompin stupidity! A true hard core red-neck manitoba boy with attitude. Dustin do me a favor and put some beats on Jagr for me will ya.
Gaborik, this guy comes across as little ferret faced wimp. Dude is actually almot 200lbs and is 6'1" tall! Skates like hell and shoots with a howitzer. I like him. Priviet, Kak Da La Marian! Das Vidania! If ya don't know too bad, learn Russian.
Boomers...two thoughts....first thought, please tell me your wife did not give you that nickname...if so I can only surmise that it would have to do with an evil toilet trick! Second, did you play broomball? Just don't tell me it has anything to do with your love affair with the Canadians or the great Boom Boom? That is taking it too far and you need treatment. I can give you the number for our in house shrink if required.
Insert church music here...
Koivu, like him, not for hockey but what he did for the capital of lilly-pad-land in buying an MRI machine for the city. Why is it we have to wait until something shitty happens before we do something?
Kill the church music it gives me a headache.
Paul, listen and wake the fuck up....where did I finish last year? Ummm Last! So why is it that you have 5 of my players from last year? Oh...yeah...another dumb ass Trooper Trade. Im going to have to call in some professional help if my trades go to shit like last year. Either that or I will be on 48 Hours as the Hockey Pool Blogger who went mental and killed the rest of the poolies. Hey I know we all have imiganary friends, but why does mine always tell me to...whats that....ok gotta go
War soon being on Americas Most Wanted.....
How do I do that? Go from one subject to another in an instant? Think it's the A.D.D.
Penner, now this guy is cool. 245 pounds of rompin stompin stupidity! A true hard core red-neck manitoba boy with attitude. Dustin do me a favor and put some beats on Jagr for me will ya.
Gaborik, this guy comes across as little ferret faced wimp. Dude is actually almot 200lbs and is 6'1" tall! Skates like hell and shoots with a howitzer. I like him. Priviet, Kak Da La Marian! Das Vidania! If ya don't know too bad, learn Russian.
Boomers...two thoughts....first thought, please tell me your wife did not give you that nickname...if so I can only surmise that it would have to do with an evil toilet trick! Second, did you play broomball? Just don't tell me it has anything to do with your love affair with the Canadians or the great Boom Boom? That is taking it too far and you need treatment. I can give you the number for our in house shrink if required.
Insert church music here...
Koivu, like him, not for hockey but what he did for the capital of lilly-pad-land in buying an MRI machine for the city. Why is it we have to wait until something shitty happens before we do something?
Kill the church music it gives me a headache.
Paul, listen and wake the fuck up....where did I finish last year? Ummm Last! So why is it that you have 5 of my players from last year? Oh...yeah...another dumb ass Trooper Trade. Im going to have to call in some professional help if my trades go to shit like last year. Either that or I will be on 48 Hours as the Hockey Pool Blogger who went mental and killed the rest of the poolies. Hey I know we all have imiganary friends, but why does mine always tell me to...whats that....ok gotta go
War soon being on Americas Most Wanted.....
Luck of the Irish
God-Damn I hate thiefs! This is the second time in 3 months my truck has been broken into and shit has been stolen. This time right in front of my house in the middle of the night. On a good note this time I only lost a pair of sunglasses and a pack of smokes. Better than having my Treo ripped like last time. Now Im stuck with a ghetto phone and 3 more years on the contract. Sigh.
Onto hockey. Well like I said, the season started and I'm well on the way to the basement while the Spaceman/alternate universe dweller ferengie man is in the lead and has built up a substantial 13 point lead on me that will be tough to catch. I suck!
So Trev, whatcha think? Ya gots da team this year? Naaa me thinks not. But yeah you will do better than me, not! hell ya already got a 2.2 point lead on me...unlike Victor this is catchable!!
How did Chara's mom keep this guy in groceries? Swear to God this guy ate his broccoli as a kid! Zdeno, I hope you bought Ma a nice spread! Pure beast! I still laugh when I remember the fight he had with that rag doll while on the Sens a couple of years ago. Whipped him around like a bean bag I damn near died laughing. Me, personally I'd have thought up some injury, maybe a hammy problem or the like and just gone turtle instead of being the joke of Youtube for the next century!
Don't imagine you will be playing Labarbra Ann Scott much between the pipes will ya? Either that or her excuse was jet-lag while in the UK. Beachballs Rule!
Back to my truck. I'm thinking, that...well actually my wife told me to think...that I should sell the pig, errr beautiful machine as it would appear that it is really not that fuel effecient as it gets a palty average of 17.2 L/100 Km....Im told this is not too good....Mayhaps this is why I'm sinking 300 bills into the big ass 120L tank a month. No Trev I aint getting a Hyundai....I told my wife that I would not get anything not north american. She said I have to go look at a Nissan Altima....and being the good ole tough red-neck I is, I said....well you guessed it...yes dear. Why are us men so fucking whipped when it comes to pussy? Answer....divorece cost more than saying yes! Ask me!
So Boston appears to have a goalie this year. Think he will last? Budaj needs to be good and stay healthy or we will get to see Mr Propecia....kinda like Mr Coffee only with hair and a french accent. Don't worry Jose, Canada would not want you anyway, even if you were clean.
Raffi Torres? SPARE ME! Will Edmonton actually score a goal this year? Yeah I want Lowe as my GM. Can't sign a friggin autograph let alone a star player. How long is Souray gonna last? Probably a while since he is from the area but the rest just want to run away! Home team discount in Edmonton means you get dental care and BINGO lessons! If you score 20 goals you can go square dancing at the community center and eat perogies!
Well ya got the young guy I like in Jordan. He will be a hell of player this year me thinks. Wish I could have kept him and it was a hard decision for sure to drop him.
Chris Drury has shot his load as far as Im concerned. This is his last contract...Why cant this guy stay put for more than one contract? I dont think he will be anywhere as good as last year.
At the end of the year I hope Im in front of you Trev. May gangrene infest your every cut this year!
War beating the Lephachaun to his pot of gold!
Onto hockey. Well like I said, the season started and I'm well on the way to the basement while the Spaceman/alternate universe dweller ferengie man is in the lead and has built up a substantial 13 point lead on me that will be tough to catch. I suck!
So Trev, whatcha think? Ya gots da team this year? Naaa me thinks not. But yeah you will do better than me, not! hell ya already got a 2.2 point lead on me...unlike Victor this is catchable!!
How did Chara's mom keep this guy in groceries? Swear to God this guy ate his broccoli as a kid! Zdeno, I hope you bought Ma a nice spread! Pure beast! I still laugh when I remember the fight he had with that rag doll while on the Sens a couple of years ago. Whipped him around like a bean bag I damn near died laughing. Me, personally I'd have thought up some injury, maybe a hammy problem or the like and just gone turtle instead of being the joke of Youtube for the next century!
Don't imagine you will be playing Labarbra Ann Scott much between the pipes will ya? Either that or her excuse was jet-lag while in the UK. Beachballs Rule!
Back to my truck. I'm thinking, that...well actually my wife told me to think...that I should sell the pig, errr beautiful machine as it would appear that it is really not that fuel effecient as it gets a palty average of 17.2 L/100 Km....Im told this is not too good....Mayhaps this is why I'm sinking 300 bills into the big ass 120L tank a month. No Trev I aint getting a Hyundai....I told my wife that I would not get anything not north american. She said I have to go look at a Nissan Altima....and being the good ole tough red-neck I is, I said....well you guessed it...yes dear. Why are us men so fucking whipped when it comes to pussy? Answer....divorece cost more than saying yes! Ask me!
So Boston appears to have a goalie this year. Think he will last? Budaj needs to be good and stay healthy or we will get to see Mr Propecia....kinda like Mr Coffee only with hair and a french accent. Don't worry Jose, Canada would not want you anyway, even if you were clean.
Raffi Torres? SPARE ME! Will Edmonton actually score a goal this year? Yeah I want Lowe as my GM. Can't sign a friggin autograph let alone a star player. How long is Souray gonna last? Probably a while since he is from the area but the rest just want to run away! Home team discount in Edmonton means you get dental care and BINGO lessons! If you score 20 goals you can go square dancing at the community center and eat perogies!
Well ya got the young guy I like in Jordan. He will be a hell of player this year me thinks. Wish I could have kept him and it was a hard decision for sure to drop him.
Chris Drury has shot his load as far as Im concerned. This is his last contract...Why cant this guy stay put for more than one contract? I dont think he will be anywhere as good as last year.
At the end of the year I hope Im in front of you Trev. May gangrene infest your every cut this year!
War beating the Lephachaun to his pot of gold!
Friday, September 28, 2007
Beached Whales
Adam, Dude if you want to improve your team you have to start with a decent name...not one synonomous with upturned fish roiling in the surf fighting for air as their lungs colapse in on them! But, then again, looking at your team it is pretty apropos. In a word you suck worse than I do! I know, last years outcome was not your fault...but this years is!
Just a question...Is B. Jackman related to the auction? What is with all these friggin rich prima-dona boys playing hockey? Yeah I know I'm off on another tangent, but what the hell is Comrie doing playing hockey...or claiming to? Pappy has mo money than 98% of Canadians...Mike did you piss off daddy so you cant get an inheratence until you win a couple of cups? Man if that were me I would have been kissing dads ass my whole life waiting for him to kick so I could sit back on a beach and drink foo foo umbrella drinks and chase hot chicks all my life.
Bill Guerin is in for a shock this year when he gets on the ice and finds he has no support staff anywhere to help him out. Speaking of Comrie, is he going to be Billy's line mate? For the last few years it has been nothing but a friggin gong show on the island and I cant see it improving at all this year....Personally I think our commish will be in tough with his lost islands goalie. Bill, retire you old shit.
Ok I'm not the kind of guy to kick someone when he is down....actually that's exactly what I'am..reason, cause if he gets up my ass gets kicked, so just to let you know Adam...it is YOU who should have been in last place last year except for my failed attempt to lose points in the last couple of weeks to secure the best draft pick. Ok it did not work but what the hell, I tried.
OH>>>>Did you guys hear about friggin Mike Vick getting caught smoking tree? Tattoo a real big yellow fucking "L" on this guy, throw him in the can so far back there that he will have to be fed with a rocket launcher and stick a fork in him cause this guy is finished. Play football again? I laugh at you you dumb ass arrogant piece of crap, go back to the back woods of Va, sit on a porch with Cleteus and Jethro and get your corn from a jar. "I'm so sorry for all the damage I caused as someone to whom kids look up to...k, is the mike off, coool, dude stop bogarting that J! Mike just shut up! And where would we be without a quick note on our favorite Heisman trophy winner O.J. Simpson....Just one question Juice, How you gonna look for Nicole's killer in the slam? Rot in Hell.
Ok back to trashing Adam. Wanna make a bet? How about a nice friendly bet that you will suck worse than I this year....Winner gets the others 10 round pick next year? Seeing as how Victor fucked me out of my good picks next year we will have to do this under the table, cause I'm already out 2 picks next year. wink wink :-)
Ok in all seriousnessnessness the only people I want are frankenstein (Phaneuf), Souray and Kipper...the rest can be burnt to appease the hockey Gods for all I care. Have a great year Adam! Lots of luck you gonna need it man! Now, just to bring you up a bit and make you feel better, naaa enjoy the sewer dude!
War Whale Blubber
CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW!!!!!
Just a question...Is B. Jackman related to the auction? What is with all these friggin rich prima-dona boys playing hockey? Yeah I know I'm off on another tangent, but what the hell is Comrie doing playing hockey...or claiming to? Pappy has mo money than 98% of Canadians...Mike did you piss off daddy so you cant get an inheratence until you win a couple of cups? Man if that were me I would have been kissing dads ass my whole life waiting for him to kick so I could sit back on a beach and drink foo foo umbrella drinks and chase hot chicks all my life.
Bill Guerin is in for a shock this year when he gets on the ice and finds he has no support staff anywhere to help him out. Speaking of Comrie, is he going to be Billy's line mate? For the last few years it has been nothing but a friggin gong show on the island and I cant see it improving at all this year....Personally I think our commish will be in tough with his lost islands goalie. Bill, retire you old shit.
Ok I'm not the kind of guy to kick someone when he is down....actually that's exactly what I'am..reason, cause if he gets up my ass gets kicked, so just to let you know Adam...it is YOU who should have been in last place last year except for my failed attempt to lose points in the last couple of weeks to secure the best draft pick. Ok it did not work but what the hell, I tried.
OH>>>>Did you guys hear about friggin Mike Vick getting caught smoking tree? Tattoo a real big yellow fucking "L" on this guy, throw him in the can so far back there that he will have to be fed with a rocket launcher and stick a fork in him cause this guy is finished. Play football again? I laugh at you you dumb ass arrogant piece of crap, go back to the back woods of Va, sit on a porch with Cleteus and Jethro and get your corn from a jar. "I'm so sorry for all the damage I caused as someone to whom kids look up to...k, is the mike off, coool, dude stop bogarting that J! Mike just shut up! And where would we be without a quick note on our favorite Heisman trophy winner O.J. Simpson....Just one question Juice, How you gonna look for Nicole's killer in the slam? Rot in Hell.
Ok back to trashing Adam. Wanna make a bet? How about a nice friendly bet that you will suck worse than I this year....Winner gets the others 10 round pick next year? Seeing as how Victor fucked me out of my good picks next year we will have to do this under the table, cause I'm already out 2 picks next year. wink wink :-)
Ok in all seriousnessnessness the only people I want are frankenstein (Phaneuf), Souray and Kipper...the rest can be burnt to appease the hockey Gods for all I care. Have a great year Adam! Lots of luck you gonna need it man! Now, just to bring you up a bit and make you feel better, naaa enjoy the sewer dude!
War Whale Blubber
CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW!!!!!
Thursday, September 27, 2007
Seeing the Future (or how I screwed Ken out of some great picks)
Victor Victor Victor, How dear sir is life without a goalie? What goes around comes around don't it? NOW you will feel the wrath of worry, intrepidation and foolishness at not getting a goalie in an earlier selection! Hmmm Kind of like I felt all last year....It sucks! Who will be at the pharmacy first? Who will leave his groin on the ice first? Who will be the first to say "I've fallen and I cant get up? My money is on Hasek the Hopeless. Oh FYI, I know who his backup is and who has him as well...just drop by and I can point you in the right direction.
So after holding my thoughts of revenge all year for a dumb-ass trade with the leader of Furengi race, the time has come for REVENGE, SWEET REVENGE!!! I feel like Im on top of the mountain....hey wait a minute...I'am at the top of the mountain. Basically I learned by looking at a few of the leaders how important a goalie is. Hence why I took 2 pretty much right away and left the slim pickings for the rest of you.
All in all a good solid north american team with the exception of a couple of puftas from the land of the frog. If and ONLY if your two starters stay healthy will you have a chance...hey I know Im preaching to the choir and this sounds like a repeat of your entry. The evil menical Trooper is the one to blame for this, but I will give you credit, you taught me. Is Friggin Denis even playing this year? Friggin waste of skin, oxygen thief, french butt head.
I think you were a tad hard on yourself in your own look at your team. I think you have a very good chance of taking second or third. And with a good trade to me for a goalie you might even win. But sigh...the cost will be heavy. You will feel the wrath of the federation! Wow...where the hell did that come from? a Galaxy far far away me thinks!
Hasek. You know why this guy wears a cag instead of a real goalie mask? It is the scare factor, plain and simple, when he talks he sounds like a friggin babling idiot and it just confuses the opposition into looking at him to see what he is saying and then they see his face, the face only a mother could love, a mixture between Mike Ricci and a can of smashed assholes. Basically he scares the opposition into a disbelieving state at his ugliness, and they are too close to get a good shot by the time realize what has happened...good tactic...Hey did you know Hasek has his own line of clothes? it wounds like umbagoofur or something close to that anyway!
My peeves with your team are few and Im sure I will be looking up at you in the standings...until the dreaded injury comes, at which point I should be close enough to catch you! If not...well there is always next year!
Live long and prosper!
Peace Out!
So after holding my thoughts of revenge all year for a dumb-ass trade with the leader of Furengi race, the time has come for REVENGE, SWEET REVENGE!!! I feel like Im on top of the mountain....hey wait a minute...I'am at the top of the mountain. Basically I learned by looking at a few of the leaders how important a goalie is. Hence why I took 2 pretty much right away and left the slim pickings for the rest of you.
All in all a good solid north american team with the exception of a couple of puftas from the land of the frog. If and ONLY if your two starters stay healthy will you have a chance...hey I know Im preaching to the choir and this sounds like a repeat of your entry. The evil menical Trooper is the one to blame for this, but I will give you credit, you taught me. Is Friggin Denis even playing this year? Friggin waste of skin, oxygen thief, french butt head.
I think you were a tad hard on yourself in your own look at your team. I think you have a very good chance of taking second or third. And with a good trade to me for a goalie you might even win. But sigh...the cost will be heavy. You will feel the wrath of the federation! Wow...where the hell did that come from? a Galaxy far far away me thinks!
Hasek. You know why this guy wears a cag instead of a real goalie mask? It is the scare factor, plain and simple, when he talks he sounds like a friggin babling idiot and it just confuses the opposition into looking at him to see what he is saying and then they see his face, the face only a mother could love, a mixture between Mike Ricci and a can of smashed assholes. Basically he scares the opposition into a disbelieving state at his ugliness, and they are too close to get a good shot by the time realize what has happened...good tactic...Hey did you know Hasek has his own line of clothes? it wounds like umbagoofur or something close to that anyway!
My peeves with your team are few and Im sure I will be looking up at you in the standings...until the dreaded injury comes, at which point I should be close enough to catch you! If not...well there is always next year!
Live long and prosper!
Peace Out!
Genuflecting to the Gods
Hey Kevin, look at the standings, you are in last place and I'm in first!!! Cool! Won't last for long but it sure feels good...till the conclusion of the first game anyway :-)
One of the best trades last year was between myself and Kevin. It certainly benefited both of us and possibly pushed Kev over the top of the Bruins.
After Kevin collected his wininngs at the end of the year I'm sure the only thought in his head was "great, now I have to decimate my team and give all the good players to the serfs below me". Well, yes, you did and maybe someone will have the team to kick your ass off the throne this year. Looking at your team I have to admit it will be tough.
Has anyone ever wanted to just pull out a sniper rifle while say, someone like Iginla was skating down the ice on a breakaway and smoke his ass? I think all of us who lost last year should be given a "Thin the Heard" day in which we can kill an opponents points for a day...just because....laugh, it would be neat if you had bet on a nag at a horse race and while it was running were able to put a heater through the leader on the backstretch :-) I think I have some pent up rage in me somewhere....probably due my ex-wife. Bitch. Woops, I think I said that in my big boy voice.
Kevin, at the end of the day you are no fun! Your team is very good, with the exception of "Fatty McButterpants" (K. Tkachuk). Anyone want to put bets on how long he will be overweight this year? He goes to Omar the Tent Maker for his hockey pants. Mumu's are us! His snacks are Buttersickles followed by Gravy shooters. Keith, invest in a God-damn Salad once in a while will ya!
Overall Kevin could make the united nations look bad with the amount of different countries represented in his team. He certainly has a few studs in Iggy, Malkin, Tanguay, Mary-Ann Hossa, Gonchar, etc.
Is Modano still bankrupt? This guy should have retired a while ago except for his money problems. Why is it that people say the older players deserve more respect than others? When Mike took a swing at another player last year with his stick it was stated in a few places that he did not get respect and was hit dirty.....Tough Shit pumpkin! Want some cheese to go with that whine? You play the game you get hit. Suck it up or retire.
I think the only thing at this point that will stop us from catching him will be injuries...or perhaps if we hired a couple of Guido's to "visit" Kevin's house some dark snowy night.
I have to laugh...again at a name...Poor bastard....Pascal Leclair...I think I would have to slap my mom. Tell me this kid never got his beats at school? I guess being a goalie was just an extension of the abuse he recieved at school :-)
Basically I think we will be sucking hind tit to Kevin this year. Repeat? In my opinion yep. But beware dude....Guido is a friend of mine! In my best Italian slanted voice....You win again, we will have to talk.
War Keeping the target in the scope
Click
One of the best trades last year was between myself and Kevin. It certainly benefited both of us and possibly pushed Kev over the top of the Bruins.
After Kevin collected his wininngs at the end of the year I'm sure the only thought in his head was "great, now I have to decimate my team and give all the good players to the serfs below me". Well, yes, you did and maybe someone will have the team to kick your ass off the throne this year. Looking at your team I have to admit it will be tough.
Has anyone ever wanted to just pull out a sniper rifle while say, someone like Iginla was skating down the ice on a breakaway and smoke his ass? I think all of us who lost last year should be given a "Thin the Heard" day in which we can kill an opponents points for a day...just because....laugh, it would be neat if you had bet on a nag at a horse race and while it was running were able to put a heater through the leader on the backstretch :-) I think I have some pent up rage in me somewhere....probably due my ex-wife. Bitch. Woops, I think I said that in my big boy voice.
Kevin, at the end of the day you are no fun! Your team is very good, with the exception of "Fatty McButterpants" (K. Tkachuk). Anyone want to put bets on how long he will be overweight this year? He goes to Omar the Tent Maker for his hockey pants. Mumu's are us! His snacks are Buttersickles followed by Gravy shooters. Keith, invest in a God-damn Salad once in a while will ya!
Overall Kevin could make the united nations look bad with the amount of different countries represented in his team. He certainly has a few studs in Iggy, Malkin, Tanguay, Mary-Ann Hossa, Gonchar, etc.
Is Modano still bankrupt? This guy should have retired a while ago except for his money problems. Why is it that people say the older players deserve more respect than others? When Mike took a swing at another player last year with his stick it was stated in a few places that he did not get respect and was hit dirty.....Tough Shit pumpkin! Want some cheese to go with that whine? You play the game you get hit. Suck it up or retire.
I think the only thing at this point that will stop us from catching him will be injuries...or perhaps if we hired a couple of Guido's to "visit" Kevin's house some dark snowy night.
I have to laugh...again at a name...Poor bastard....Pascal Leclair...I think I would have to slap my mom. Tell me this kid never got his beats at school? I guess being a goalie was just an extension of the abuse he recieved at school :-)
Basically I think we will be sucking hind tit to Kevin this year. Repeat? In my opinion yep. But beware dude....Guido is a friend of mine! In my best Italian slanted voice....You win again, we will have to talk.
War Keeping the target in the scope
Click
If a Bear Shits in the Forest does Anyone Really Care?
Mike...The only question I have for you is....How the hell did you come in second? The answer, for all you with curious minds...is GOALIES. I, as well as others I'm sure, tried to pry either of these two out of him him last year with no results whatsoever...I could have given him 4 players, 2 draft picks, my truck, my first born, 10 grand, a pint of my blood and a princes god-damn harem with 50 virgins and I MIGHT have got one of them. I gave you some good offers but in the end you were wrong Mike and you stink! I feel better now. Actually on a serious note I have to thank Mike for all his work, as we all should, and his insider info he shared with me last year.... and for picking some rather shitty third rate players for me while I was away in England. Thanks for nothing Mike.
Ahhh Mike's team...Let me start with St.Louis. You little piece of shit smurf! I hate you! You ride on the coat-tails of the rest of the players on your team and because you are such an insignificant piece of crap, you tend to get open because the real players in this league (Non-french Canadians and non Euro's) think they will just run over your ass when you get the puck. This moron gets open and because he is so small no one sees him until it is too late. One hit, preferably by oh I don't know maybe Simon, Phaneuf or the like will end your over-paid career. Then you can sit back in Quebec and drink your labatts 50.
Stillman...Only good thing about him is that he shares my birthday. Go look for yourself and bring me a present when it comes.
Paul Mara...sounds like a Cigarette...
Parise..at least he had a good father...he was the one who did the stick swinging at the ref in the 72 series...Sweet! Friggin communist ref deserved it. I really wish he would have got the Sherwood taste test :-)
Savard...See St.Louis but add 'whining ass cry baby'...I got no respect in Calgary! Hey buttmunch that's because you sucked!
Eric Johnson...Now this guy I like.....I wonder why....BECAUSE I PICKED HIM! That's why! Just goes to show you how bad my team is...I cant remember what the hell I got for him...A mind is a terrible thing to waste!
Rostislav Klesla - Ok, listen, my wife is Russian, I understand a couple of languages, but how the hell do you say this? Christ it's worse than my name! I bet he hates his parents. They should have just called him Ivan like the majority of the good little communists. Seriously...would you call your kid Adolph? I thought not.
Mike...what is this thing you have with bears? Is there something you are not telling us? How often do you go to the zoo? Oh, I do like your logo :-) The only good bear is a skinned bear!
Besides Mikes fantastic goalie duo I really dont see how he can improve this year. Great goalies, a bunch of wimpy, french and foreign Euro trash with no size or guts and the rest are has beens on teams that arn't going anywhere...My prediction...best place finish of 7. But what the hell do I know I finished last.
Mike learn not to be such a blood thirsty fucking leach when you trade, and give us bottom dwellers a chance.
I know I know I friggin know!....I have a potty mouth...so sue me.
War dead bears.
Out.
Ahhh Mike's team...Let me start with St.Louis. You little piece of shit smurf! I hate you! You ride on the coat-tails of the rest of the players on your team and because you are such an insignificant piece of crap, you tend to get open because the real players in this league (Non-french Canadians and non Euro's) think they will just run over your ass when you get the puck. This moron gets open and because he is so small no one sees him until it is too late. One hit, preferably by oh I don't know maybe Simon, Phaneuf or the like will end your over-paid career. Then you can sit back in Quebec and drink your labatts 50.
Stillman...Only good thing about him is that he shares my birthday. Go look for yourself and bring me a present when it comes.
Paul Mara...sounds like a Cigarette...
Parise..at least he had a good father...he was the one who did the stick swinging at the ref in the 72 series...Sweet! Friggin communist ref deserved it. I really wish he would have got the Sherwood taste test :-)
Savard...See St.Louis but add 'whining ass cry baby'...I got no respect in Calgary! Hey buttmunch that's because you sucked!
Eric Johnson...Now this guy I like.....I wonder why....BECAUSE I PICKED HIM! That's why! Just goes to show you how bad my team is...I cant remember what the hell I got for him...A mind is a terrible thing to waste!
Rostislav Klesla - Ok, listen, my wife is Russian, I understand a couple of languages, but how the hell do you say this? Christ it's worse than my name! I bet he hates his parents. They should have just called him Ivan like the majority of the good little communists. Seriously...would you call your kid Adolph? I thought not.
Mike...what is this thing you have with bears? Is there something you are not telling us? How often do you go to the zoo? Oh, I do like your logo :-) The only good bear is a skinned bear!
Besides Mikes fantastic goalie duo I really dont see how he can improve this year. Great goalies, a bunch of wimpy, french and foreign Euro trash with no size or guts and the rest are has beens on teams that arn't going anywhere...My prediction...best place finish of 7. But what the hell do I know I finished last.
Mike learn not to be such a blood thirsty fucking leach when you trade, and give us bottom dwellers a chance.
I know I know I friggin know!....I have a potty mouth...so sue me.
War dead bears.
Out.
Troopers Takes on The Teams!
Alright seeing as how all the other smarter and more medicated..err educated Blog Masters have decided to rate the other teams I thought it only required that I do something different...Like maybe rate our wife's? Naa maybe not. But it would be interesting! Maybe some of the NHL's finer specimens of feminity will be discussed in the future...We could start with.....TIE DOMI! Dude, Belinda is a skank!~ There ain't enough Jack Daniels to drink that cow pretty!
Sigh....Ok seeing as how some of you might take this the wrong way...please dont...its all in fun. But what the hell if you do, knock yourself out just dont knock me out....my rifles are bigger than yours! Na na na na na
I will start with my discusting, dormant, dilapated team. The first thing you will see, if you really care to look is that I have got a ton of Friggin Make Believes....How this happend I have no bloody idea whatsoever. I hate the friggin Maple Laughs, but if they help me out then I guess I will keep them.
I got stuck last year with couple of real dogs in net, trading for Denis to the Furengie (so I cant spell for shit, sorry Victor) was a huge mistake! I should have traded for "Eat a Big Meal" (Rita McNeil) and slapped a mattress on her, stuffed the top of the net with hot dogs and cheezy puffs and red wine and she would have done better than what I had in net!!!! I digress...SO my attempt was two-fold in this years draft, get a couple of decent if not stellar goalies and in so doing, limit the number of other GM's of getting a good one. Dirty? Yep! Do I care? Nope :-) Kinda like Mike's comment about my last post actually :-)
My forwards....holy shit...well at least I still have Crosby, the main saving grace of this miserable team. Horton plays too hard and will probably get injured somewhere along the line. The others...the Geritol gang of Sundin, Shanny, Smith, Tucker and Roberts will probably get me a couple of points but I'm certain will be convalesing at the Airborne Recovery Center sometime this year sitting back and enjoying a Canadian with me while contemplating their retirement from this glorious game. God bless the young guys of Toews and Kane and Crosby...chancy but promising in the future...however after my nauseating season the future is now...could be a long year of replacements!
Defence - a couple of good ones, lots of flash in the pans....average at best. Potential? Yep...potentially devasting with the exception of Liles.
Goalies - got a few and agree with Victors take on them...read his bolg as Im really not going to repeat it here. The good thing about them......when the rest of your goalies are injured...you know where to come.....You want a goalie, you talk to me....Ok Mel Gibson Im not....My neck is too red....as seen by the decided lack of Euro Trash on my team. Is Jagr still alive? Would someone PLEASE just beat this arrogant shit senceless for me?
Prediction.....I suck, but not as bad some others, best result at the end of the day is a middle of the pack run and that is being generous...either that or I will win the whole friggin thing and ya'll can eat my shorts! No? Yeah...probably Not but it was funny writing it :-)
Sigh....Ok seeing as how some of you might take this the wrong way...please dont...its all in fun. But what the hell if you do, knock yourself out just dont knock me out....my rifles are bigger than yours! Na na na na na
I will start with my discusting, dormant, dilapated team. The first thing you will see, if you really care to look is that I have got a ton of Friggin Make Believes....How this happend I have no bloody idea whatsoever. I hate the friggin Maple Laughs, but if they help me out then I guess I will keep them.
I got stuck last year with couple of real dogs in net, trading for Denis to the Furengie (so I cant spell for shit, sorry Victor) was a huge mistake! I should have traded for "Eat a Big Meal" (Rita McNeil) and slapped a mattress on her, stuffed the top of the net with hot dogs and cheezy puffs and red wine and she would have done better than what I had in net!!!! I digress...SO my attempt was two-fold in this years draft, get a couple of decent if not stellar goalies and in so doing, limit the number of other GM's of getting a good one. Dirty? Yep! Do I care? Nope :-) Kinda like Mike's comment about my last post actually :-)
My forwards....holy shit...well at least I still have Crosby, the main saving grace of this miserable team. Horton plays too hard and will probably get injured somewhere along the line. The others...the Geritol gang of Sundin, Shanny, Smith, Tucker and Roberts will probably get me a couple of points but I'm certain will be convalesing at the Airborne Recovery Center sometime this year sitting back and enjoying a Canadian with me while contemplating their retirement from this glorious game. God bless the young guys of Toews and Kane and Crosby...chancy but promising in the future...however after my nauseating season the future is now...could be a long year of replacements!
Defence - a couple of good ones, lots of flash in the pans....average at best. Potential? Yep...potentially devasting with the exception of Liles.
Goalies - got a few and agree with Victors take on them...read his bolg as Im really not going to repeat it here. The good thing about them......when the rest of your goalies are injured...you know where to come.....You want a goalie, you talk to me....Ok Mel Gibson Im not....My neck is too red....as seen by the decided lack of Euro Trash on my team. Is Jagr still alive? Would someone PLEASE just beat this arrogant shit senceless for me?
Prediction.....I suck, but not as bad some others, best result at the end of the day is a middle of the pack run and that is being generous...either that or I will win the whole friggin thing and ya'll can eat my shorts! No? Yeah...probably Not but it was funny writing it :-)
War Sexy Hot Hockey Wife's!
Late!
You will be Assimilated!
Ugggg, here I'am staring at this blog, burp, barf or whatever technical dumb-ass name you want to use for "Internet geek with no freaking life" and wondering just how this fine upstanding former soldier EVER got stuck in this realm of idiocy.....I hate blogs, however like the Borg say I have been assimilated to the world of the GDC Hockey blog world.
Dont look here for anything important. It is a complete spoof on blogs and will be full of ripe sarcastic and hardly relavant points about anything to do with our hockey pool and hopefully will provide a bit of humor to you....but dont hold your breat...h!
In my first series of posts you will see, well, something sarcastic certainly and a few of my inside peeves of all things "Hockey Pool" and how some dumb ass managers try to pull off dumb ass trades...maybe like offering someone a player of no significance for a future draft pick....and once the manager says no we find the player has been dropped the next day.....Do you people seriously think we are that bloody stupid? Sigh...why bother...and no it is not just one person either.
Jezz pass me another friggin Canadian Trevor and lets tell some old war stories!
Have a good one Jumper!
Trooper
Dont look here for anything important. It is a complete spoof on blogs and will be full of ripe sarcastic and hardly relavant points about anything to do with our hockey pool and hopefully will provide a bit of humor to you....but dont hold your breat...h!
In my first series of posts you will see, well, something sarcastic certainly and a few of my inside peeves of all things "Hockey Pool" and how some dumb ass managers try to pull off dumb ass trades...maybe like offering someone a player of no significance for a future draft pick....and once the manager says no we find the player has been dropped the next day.....Do you people seriously think we are that bloody stupid? Sigh...why bother...and no it is not just one person either.
Jezz pass me another friggin Canadian Trevor and lets tell some old war stories!
Have a good one Jumper!
Trooper
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